Back to Book List Attachment
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Title |
Author |
Comments |
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The Attachment Therapy Companion: Key Practices for Treating Children & Families |
Becker Weidmann, Arthur, et al. |
Author has multiple books that are helpful |
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Addiction as an Attachment Disorder |
Flores, Phillip J. |
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Becoming Attached |
Karen, Robert |
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Once They Hear My Name: Korean Adoptees Search for Identity |
Lammert, Marilyn & Hess, Mary Anne |
Edited book of nine real stories, based on interviews, of adult Korean adoptees. GWSCSW member Marilyn Lammert is one of the editors. Tapestry Books has other books about adoption |
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Brief Dynamic Therapy |
Levenson, Hanna |
Concise, great outline for using EFT interventions in an individual therapy setting, attachment-focused EFT (as opposed to Greenberg's individual EFT) |
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Attachment Theory and Research in Clinical Work with Adults |
Obegi, Joseph H. & Berant, Ety, (Eds.) |
Sue’s chapter on individual EFT is terrific and has a great transcript of an individual EFT session |
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Coming Home to Self |
Verrier, Nancy |
Blended Families
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Title |
Author |
Comments |
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http://www.familylife.com/ |
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Love in the Blended Family: Stepfamilies: A Package Deal |
Clubb, Angela |
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Step Families |
Connolly, Joy |
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The Smart Stepfamily: Seven Steps to a Healthy Family |
Deal, Ron L |
Author’s website also includes materials on blending families from Christian perspective http://www.smartstepfamilies.com/ |
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StepWars: Overcoming the Perils and Making Peace in Adult Stepfamilies |
Grace, Gabe & Lipman-Blumen, Jean |
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Stepmonster: A New Look at Why Real Stepmothers Think, Feel, and Act the Way They Do |
Martin, Wednesday |
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Boundaries, Revised and Revisited |
Mellody, Pia |
From “The Meadows;” fun to listen to |
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Surviving and Thriving in Step Family Relationships: What Works and What Doesn’t |
Papernow, Patricia |
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www.stepfamilies.info |
The National Stepfamily Resource Center |
Great place to find out about recent studies, programs, etc |
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How to Win as a Stepfamily |
Visher, Emiy & Visher, John |
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Wisdom on Step-Parenting: How to Succeed Where Others Fail |
Weiss-Wisdom, Diana |
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Stepcoupling: Creating and Sustaining a Strong Marriage in Today’s Blended Family |
Wisdom, Susan & Green, Jennifer |
Boundaries
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Title |
Author |
Comments |
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Boundary Issues: Using Boundary Intelligence to Get the Intimacy You Want and the Independence You Need in Life, Love, and Work |
Adams, Jane |
Nuanced discussion of the spectrum of boundaries; includes exercises |
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Disease to Please: Curing the People-Pleasing Syndrome |
Braiker, Harriet B. |
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Children of the Self-Absorbed |
Brown, Nina |
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Boundaries When to Say Yes, When to Say No-To Take Control of Your Life |
Cloud, Henry & Townsend, John |
Christian perspective with many biblical references; audio version is good |
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Boundaries Face to Face: How to Have That Difficult Conversation You've Been Avoiding |
Cloud, Henry & Townsend, John |
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Emotional Blackmail |
Forward, Susan |
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Too Close for Comfort?: Questioning the New Intimacy of Today's Mother Daughter Relationship |
Gordon, Linda Perlman & Shaffer, Susan |
Discusses healthy boundaries for both mother and daughter |
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Boundaries: Where you end and I begin |
Katherine, Anne |
Good for most reading levels |
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Where to Draw the Line” |
Katherine, Anne |
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Marriage Rules: A Manual for the Married and the Coupled Up |
Lerner, Harriet |
family systems perspective, discussing assertive communication, boundaries, relationship responsibilities |
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Making Contact |
Satir, Virginia |
Classic text |
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Your Many Faces: The First Step to Being Loved |
Satir, Virginia |
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When I Say No I Feel Guilty |
Smith, Manual J. |
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Boundaries and Relationships: Knowing, Enjoying and Protecting the Self |
Whitfield, Charles |
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| Boundaries: Revised and Revisited | Mellody, Pia |
CD – includes info re sexual boundaries |
Co-Dependency
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Title |
Author |
Comments |
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Codependent No More |
Beattie, Melody |
Classic text, includes focus on developing life skills |
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Beyond Codependency |
Beattie, Melody |
Appropriate for ACOAs (Adult Children of Alcoholics) |
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Struggle for Intimacy |
Geringer Woititz, Janet |
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How to Break Your Addiction to a Person: When-and Why- Love Doesn’t Work |
Halpern, Howard |
Includes case studies; helpful for those struggling to leave unhealthy/abusive relationships |
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Conquering Shame & Codependency, 8 Steps to Freeing the True You |
Lancer, Darlene |
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Codependency for Dummies |
Lancer, Darlene |
Communication skills
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Title |
Author |
Comments |
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www.pndc.com |
Non-defensive communication |
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Boundary Issues: Using Boundary Intelligence to Get the Intimacy You Want and the Independence You Need in Life, Love, and Work |
Adams, Jane |
Nuanced discussion of the spectrum of boundaries; includes exercises |
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Listening: the Forgotten Skill: A Self-Teaching Guide |
Burley-Allen, Madelyn |
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A Couples Guide to Communication |
Gottman, John |
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Getting The Love You Want |
Hendrix, Harville |
Describes potential for intimacy and healing inherent in conflict and describes the Imago dialogue process, which is a very useful tool for helping couples stay connected and communicate clearly |
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Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love |
Johnson, Susan |
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Couple Skills |
McKay, Matthew et al. |
"Clean Communication" chapter is particularly helpful for couples |
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Messages: The Communication Skills Book |
McKay, Matthew et al. |
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Making Contact |
Satir, Virginia |
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Your Many Faces |
Satir, Virginia |
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| Conversationally Speaking: Tested New Ways to Increase Your Personal and Social Effectiveness | Garner, Alan |
Couples Therapy
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Title |
Author |
Comments |
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Transforming the Legacy: Couple Therapy with Survivors of Childhood Trauma |
Basham, Kathryn |
For clinician |
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Getting The Love You Want |
Hendrix, Harville |
Describes potential for intimacy and healing inherent in conflict and describes the Imago dialogue process, which is a very useful tool for helping couples stay connected and communicate clearly |
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Interventions for Children of Divorce: Custody, Access, and Psychotherapy |
Hodges, William & Weiner, Irving |
For clinician, theoretical context |
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Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love |
Johnson, Susan |
For clinician or clients |
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Talk to Me Like I'm Someone You Love: Relationship Repair in a Flash |
Dreyfus, Nancy |
Initially for couples, but also extremely effective for parents and kids- interactive tool that uses written messages to show how connecting to vulnerability can interrupt defensiveness and get two combative people starting to like each other again |
Crisis in Marriage/relationship
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Title |
Author |
Comments |
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Post Romantic Stress Disorder: What to Do When the Honeymoon Is Over |
Bradshaw, John |
Uses scientific research and case studies to help reader understand the stages of love and provides exercises to deepen the relationship |
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The Divorce Remedy: The Proven 7-Step Program for Saving Your Marriage |
Davis, Michelle Weiner |
Easy-to-read, solution-oriented to build stronger relationship bonds |
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Talk to Me Like I'm Someone You Love: Relationship Repair in a Flash |
Dreyfus, Nancy |
Interactive tool that uses written messages to show how connecting to vulnerability can interrupt defensiveness and get two combative people starting to like each other again |
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Too Good to Leave Too Good to Stay: A Step-by-Step Guide to Help You Decide Whether to Stay In or Get Out of Your Relationship |
Kirshenbaum, Mira |
Excellent reviews |
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Should I stay or Go? How Controlled Separation (CS) Can Save Your Marriage |
Raffel, Lee |
Addresses separation with the goal of helping couples structure a time apart while they decide whether to continue their marriage |
Divorce, Marital separation & Breakup
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Title |
Author |
Comments |
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The Good Divorce |
Ahrons, Constance |
Provides guidance through anecdotes of couples’ coping strategies |
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Divorce: The Real Truth and Hidden Dangers |
Bradley, Ann |
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Rebuilding: When Your Relationship Ends |
Fisher, Bruce |
Has accompanying workbook; differentiates processes for Dumper/Dumpee, but remains applicable for the mutually ended relationship |
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Between Love and Hate: A Guide to Civilized Divorce |
Gold, Lois |
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Mars and Venus Starting Over: A Practical Guide for Finding Love Again After a Painful Breakup, Divorce, or the Loss of a Loved One |
Gray, John |
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How to Break Your Addiction to a Person: When-and Why- Love Doesn’t Work |
Halpern, Howard |
Includes case studies; helpful for those struggling to leave unhealthy/abusive relationships |
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Creative Divorce: A New Opportunity for Personal Growth |
Krantzler, Mel |
Addresses how divorce can be a catalyst for positive transformations |
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Poems for Surviving: Breakup, Abuse and Divorce |
Martin, Marlena |
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How to Avoid the Divorce From Hell (And Dance Together at Your Daughter's Wedding) |
Talia, Sue |
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Crazy Time: Surviving Divorce and Building a New Life |
Trafford, Abigail |
Anecdotal, helps to normalize roller-coaster emotions associated with the end of a relationship; both parties find it helpful |
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Uncoupling |
Vaughan, Diane |
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Title |
Author |
Comments |
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http://singleparents.about.com |
Article for parents regarding how to speak with kids about parents' dating |
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The Good Divorce |
Ahrons, Connie |
Provides a roadmap (based on research) for a constructive approach to co-parenting |
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We're Still Family: What Grown Children Have to Say About Their Parent's Divorce |
Ahrons, Constance |
Guidance for maintaining family bonds through divorce, research data for support. |
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Second Chances: Men, Women and Children a Decade After Divorce |
Blakeslee, Sandra & Wallerstein, Judith |
Explores the impact of divorce on adults and children |
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When Parents Hurt: Compassionate Strategies When You and Your Adult Child Don’t Get Along |
Coleman, Joshua |
Written from the alienated parent's perspective |
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Divorce Casualties: Protecting Your Children from Parental Alienation |
Darnell, Douglas |
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Don't Alienate the Kids! Raising Resilient Children while Avoiding High Conflict Divorce |
Eddy,Bill |
For parents; includes questionnaires to help them evaluate what alienating behaviors they are engaging in |
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The Truth About Children and Divorce: Dealing with the Emotions so You and Your Children Can Thrive |
Emery, Robert |
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The Parental Alienation Syndrome and the Differentiation Between Fabricated and Genuine Child Sexual Abuse |
Gardner, Richard |
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Caught in the Middle: Protecting the Children of High-Conflict Divorce |
Garrity, Carla & Baris, Mitchell |
Addresses co-parenting in high-conflict situations |
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Healing Hearts: Helping Children and Adults Recover From Divorce |
Hickey, Elizabeth & Dalton, Elizabeth |
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Interventions for Children of Divorce: Custody, Access, and Psychotherapy |
Hodges, William & Weiner, Irving |
For clinician, theoretical context |
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Getting Apart Together: The Couple’s Guide to a Fair Divorce or Separation |
Kranitz, Martin A. |
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The Children's Book….For the Sake of the Children: A Communication Workbook for Separate Parenting after Divorce |
McKnight, Ericks |
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Helping Your Kids Cope with Divorce the Sandcastles Way |
Neuman, M. Gary & Romanowski, Patricia |
Developmentally based by chapter, including possible reactions, as well as ideas about how to help a child deal with feelings |
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How to Avoid the Divorce from Hell: And Dance Together at Your Daughter's Wedding |
Talia, Sue |
Educates reader regarding common pitfalls and provides useful solutions |
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Helping Children Cope With Divorce |
Teyber, Edward |
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Parents Are Forever: A Step-By-Step Guide to Becoming Successful Coparents After Divorce |
Thomas, Shirley |
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Surviving the Breakup: How Children and Parents Cope with Divorce |
Wallerstein, Judith & Kelly, Joan B. |
Addresses the short- and long-term effects of family dissolution |
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The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce: A 25 Year Landmark Study |
Wallerstein, Judith, et. al. |
Addresses common feelings and experiences children of divorce |
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What About the Kids?: Raising Your Children Before, During, and After Divorce |
Wallerstein, Judy |
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What to Tell the Kids About Your Divorce |
Weyburne, Darlene |
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Why Did You Have To Get a Divorce? And When Can I Get a Hamster?: A Guide to Parenting Through Divorce |
Wolf, Anthony |
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| Wisdom for Separated Parents: Rearranging Around the Children to Keep Kinship Strong | Osborne, Judy |
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Title |
Author |
Comments |
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How Does It Feel When Your Parents Get Divorced |
Berger, Terry |
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It's Not the End of the World |
Blume, Judy & Schermer, Judith |
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Dinosaur's Divorce: A Guide for Changing Families |
Brown, Marc & Brown, Laurie Krasny |
Ages 4-8 y/o, answers questions and concerns for children regarding divorce |
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How It Feels When Parents |
Divorce Krementz, Jill |
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Blowfish Live In the Sea |
Fox, Paula |
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Two Homes to Live In |
Hazen, Barbara Shook |
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The Invisible String |
Karst, Patrice & Stevenson, Geoff |
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It's Not Your Fault, Koko Bear: A Read-Together Book for Parents and Young Children During Divorce |
Lansky, Vicki |
Ages 3 -7 y/o, normalizes feelings, provides talking points to parents |
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Was It the Chocolate Pudding?: A Story for Little Kids About Divorce |
Levins, Sandra & Langdo, Bryan |
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Totally Uncool |
Levy, Janice & Monroe, Chris |
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Me Day |
Lexau, Joan & Weaver, Robert |
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Kid's Divorce Kit |
Magid, Ken & Schreibman, Walt |
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Two Homes |
Masurel, Claire & Denton, Kady MacDonald |
Ages 1-5 y/o, Focuses on what is gained rather than what is lost when parents divorce |
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Saturday is Pattyday |
Newman, Leslea |
About 2 moms divorcing |
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The Family Book |
Parr, Todd |
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Mom's House, Dad's House for Kids: Feeling at Home in One Home or Two |
Ricci, Isolina |
For children, practical tips and insight into managing change |
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The Kids' Book of Divorce |
Rofes, Eric |
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Stepdog |
Shyer, Marlene |
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We're Having a Tuesday |
Simoneau, DK & Cornelius, Brad |
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Mama and Daddy Bear's Divorce |
Spelman, Cornelia Maude & Parkinson, Kathy |
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The Family That Changed: A Child's Book About Divorce |
Spilke, Francine |
infidelity/affairs
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Title |
Author |
Comments |
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Reconnecting Emotionally and Physically After an Affair |
Schnell, Staci Lee |
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Title |
Author |
Comments |
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Children of the Self-Absorbed |
Brown, Nina |
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The Betrayal Bond |
Carnes, Patrick |
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Intimacy and Solitude |
Dowrick, Stephanie |
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Talk to Me Like I'm Someone You Love: Relationship Repair in a Flash |
Dreyfus, Nancy |
Interactive tool that uses written messages to show how connecting to vulnerability can interrupt defensiveness and get two combative people starting to like each other again |
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How to Stay Together Whether You Want To or Not |
Gadhia-Smith, Anita |
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Extraordinary Relationships |
Gilbert, Roberta |
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The Relationship Cure: A 5 Step Guide for Building Better Connections with Family, Friends, and Lovers |
Gottman, John & DeClaire, Joan |
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Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love |
Johnson, Susan |
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The Dance of Intimacy |
Lerner, Harriet |
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Will I Ever Be Good Enough? |
McBride, Karyl |
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Wired for Love |
Tatkin, Stan |
Author’s blog and audio series also helpful |
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Love & War in Intimate Relationships |
Tatkin, Stan |
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The Intimacy Struggle: Revised and Expanded for All Adults |
Woititz, Janet G. |
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Title |
Author |
Comments |
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Prepare/Enrich.com |
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Prepare to Last |
DVD workshop format |
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The Making of Love |
Biddulph, Steve |
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Marriage: An Everyday Sacrament |
Brennan, D. & Gagen, P. |
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The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate |
Chapman, Gary |
Christian perspective, but not overwhelming for most non-religious clients |
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Step Families |
Connolly, Joy |
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Why Marriages Succeed or Fail: How You Can Make Yours Last |
Gottman, John |
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The Marriage Clinic: A Scientifically-Based Marital Therapy |
Gottman, John |
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A Couples Guide to Communication |
Gottman, John |
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The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide From the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert |
Gottman, John M. & Silver, Nan |
Practical Guide with |
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Keeping The Love You Find |
Hendrix, Harville |
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Getting The Love You Want |
Hendrix, Harville |
Describes potential for intimacy and healing inherent in conflict and describes the Imago dialogue process, which is a very useful tool for helping couples stay connected and communicate clearly |
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Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love |
Johnson, Susan |
Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT), Attachment Theory lens- great exercises |
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Marriage Rules: A Manual for the Married and the Coupled Up |
Lerner, Harriet |
Family systems perspective, discussing assertive communication, boundaries, relationship responsibilities |
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The Dance of Intimacy |
Lerner,Harriet |
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Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It |
Love, Pat & Stosny, Steve |
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The Truth about Love |
Love, Patricia |
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Hot Monogamy: How To Achieve A More Intimate Relationship With Your Partner |
Love, Patricia & Robinson, Jo |
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12 Hours to A Great Marriage: A Step-by-Step Guide for Making Love Last |
Markman, H. et al. |
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Living & Loving Together: How to Make Your Personal Relationships More Fulfilling |
Montgomery, Bob & Evans, Lynette |
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Really Relating: How to Build an Enduring Relationship |
Newman, Margaret, et al. |
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Empowering Couples: Building on Your Strengths |
Olson, David H. & Olson, Amy K. |
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Building Relationships for Life |
Olson, David H. & Olson, Amy K. |
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Passionate Marriage: Love, Sex, and Intimacy in Emotionally Committed Relationships |
Schnarch, D. |
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Intimacy and Desire |
Schnarch, David |
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Love and War in Intimate Relationships: Connection, Disconnection, and Mutual Regulation in Couple Therapy |
Solomon, Marion F. & Tatkin Stan |
Includes references to Mindfulness, Dan Siegel, John Gottman, EFT, Imago Therapy |
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1000 Questions for Couples: Things You Should Know about Your Mate |
Spooner, Tim |
www.questionsforcouples.com Recommend couples read it together and talk about their answers to these questions and responses to their partners questions in session. Wonderful book for stimulating thoughts, feelings, curiosity and addressing values, attitudes, life goals, conflicts, potential and present |
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Wired for Love |
Tatkin, Stan |
Current research on neuroscience |
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The Case for Marriage: Why Married People are Happier, Healthier and Better Off |
Waite, Linda & Gallagher, Maggie |
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The Good Marriage: How and Why Love Lasts |
Wallerstein, Judith & Blakeslee, Sandra |
Identifies characteristics of enduring relationships |
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The Intimacy Struggle: Revised and Expanded for All Adults |
Woititz, Janet G. |